"Leet" & Text Speak Are For Chumps!

(Update: I recently started watching the show Californication starring Davie Duchovny. The scene featured above seemed very appropriate for this post so I thought I would update it. All I can say is, Amen Brother!!!)

In keeping with today's theme of "netiquette", I thought I would cover something that's bothered me for a long time. I understand in this age of free WiFi, high speed Internet, and instant communication we want to spread news and greetings as quickly as possible. But, unless you're stuck using a normal 10 key cell phone for texting (If you are, GET A NEW PHONE!), there's no need for fancy text and IM lingo.

I'm assuming the people who you are talking to are listening/reading because they want to hear from you. They will be willing to wait that few extra seconds for you to form a full thought in your head and type it out. Learning to type correctly with proper spelling, grammar and punctuation will be an invaluable tool that will help you the rest of your life.

Writing in "leet" speak makes you look like an ignorant douche who watched the Matrix and Hackers too many times while you were waiting for your buddies to show up for your LAN party with that case of Mt. Dew they promised you for hosting this week. Billy's mom got real mad about the Cheetos dust that wouldn't vacuum out of the shag carpet in the basement last weekend.

When you have a full QWERTY keyboard phone or you're instant messaging on your PC, there's no reason to use things like "rofl" or "ttyl". You aren't rolling on the floor laughing and maybe you will talk to me later but take the time to explain that you found something amusing or wish me a fond farewell. Let that person you're talking to know that you care enough to write in proper English. (Or whatever language you speak.) Go ahead and show off that community college education.

Hell, I had to learn to type on a typewriter in high school and perfected touch typing on my Apple IIe. There has to be a free typing tutor site out there on the web these days or you could even pony up a few bucks and pass them on to Mavis Beacon.

(While you're at it, stop typing in all caps and don't forward me your spam emails. Trust I'm not going to read them anyway.)