Monday, May 12, 2008

Counter-Chump: Being A Hypocritical, Corporate-Hating Hippie Is For Chumps!


Why are people so quick to jump onto their high-moral-horse over one company, but then so quick to look the other way when another, equally-large company does the same?

May I remind the public that it was beloved-by-hippies Apple that basically invented (or at least popularized) proprietary digital rights management in regards to music sales? Thank you, Apple, for forcing me to use your software AND admittedly-shiny hardware when all I want to do is convince my friends how awesome the latest Avril Lavigne album is (if my heart could write songs, it would sound like these).

Also, lest we forget that the adored-through-nostalgia HD DVD had the full support of another, equally "evil" company--Microsoft. Are we to believe that Microsoft didn't stuff some of its billions, in stripper-accessible singles, down the dirty g-string of Hewlett Packard, Universal, Warner, and the rest? Oh but their hardware was cheaper, so all is forgiven, right?

This all reeks of the it's-ok-as-long-as-we-do-it mentality that has gotten us in trouble time after time. Just because their CEO smokes the same reefer you do doesn't make it unobjectionable. All I'm saying is that your glasses are pink if you believe that a company, any company, wouldn't do all they could get away with in order to overcharge me for their product. If you believe otherwise, you'd better prepare to be crushed by your own towering mountain of sanctimonious, chump-shaped, bricks. Just do me a favor and don't forget to take a picture just before the inevitable, cuz it would make a bitchin' wallpaper on my iPhone.

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