"Cash Only" Is For Chump!

Why in the world would anyone bother owning or operating a business these days without being able to take credit and debit payments? I understand that there are often charges associated with providing this kind of service. But come on, if you as the business owner can't afford to pay for a credit card machine, at least pass the service charge onto me. It's way more convenient for me to pay you 25 cents for a transaction than leave your business to find an ATM. If I have to leave, I'm not coming back, and you just lost a sale. Trust me, when I plan to spend money, I don't mess around.

I'm not one to carry much cash on me. Carrying cash makes it 100% more possible that I might lose said cash. If I'm not carrying it, I can't lose it. I may lose my wallet with all my cards in it but at least then I can make a phone call and verify my money's safe.

The old days of "Cash is King" are long gone. Cash is crap! I say, "All Hail Lady Visa and Lord Master Card." The American green back is worth little to nothing these days. Wealth is really only judged by how many 1's and 0's are floating around in your online bank account. Pretty soon we'll be able to pay for stuff just using our thumb prints or the RFID tag embedded under the skin in our palms.

Just remember small business owner, as you're getting high off that new Sharpie, writing you're "Cash Only" sign to scotch tape into the window, in the new world "Cash Only" translates into "No Sale".

(The only reason to prefer "cash only" is if you're avoiding paying taxes. Because if there's one thing that's definitely not for chumps, it's sticking it to the man!)